63 Days

I cried and cried when I saw his name on the business card. What were the odds of this happening? Different thoughts were going through my mind. Sometimes I’d feel relieved that we’d taken the Barnettes car because they knew my family, whom I missed. Other times I felt more guilt knowing that I’d hurt their family. I had kept my face hidden and my head down as we ran towards the car at that video store by my house, by Eddie’s house, by the Barnettes house. If I’d have looked at him, maybe I wouldn’t have gotten in, maybe I wouldn’t have let us all take that car! But, then we wouldn’t be here, at the lake, free from Challenger and the streets of Las Vegas that were surely looking for us by now.

Eddie tried to console me. He tried to tell me that this was a sign from God that he was helping us out. Certainly these people wouldn’t press charges if we WERE caught with the car. He explained how he had seen the guy pull up and just got a feeling right then that this was the car we were supposed to have, so he got up and pulled me to it, telling me to duck all the while since we were so close to my parent’s house and somebody might know me.

I cried for a while. The wind had died down enough to where I could get out and be warm enough to sit by the water. The sounds the tiny waves made as they lapped at my feet and the rock that I sat on were comforting, kind of like rocking. I was being rocked peacefully with sound. The moon sat heavy over the hills surrounding us and it seemed as though it was shining extra brightly for me tonight. It lit the ground with a light blue hue, every rock and shrub seemingly ghostlike. Everything around me was mourning. Gentle blues and purples enveloped the air, the earth, me.

The others slept that night in the car or on the ground next to it with the blankets and pillows we’d brought, but I stayed up most of the night talking to God. I asked him silently why he’d brought me to this place in my life. If everything was for a greater purpose, what exactly was mine? Was I supposed to go back to my home and be a different kid? Did he want me to go back to the desert with those people? Was this all a test? What was I supposed to do?

The breezes that night were sometimes cool, sometimes warm. The desert down around the Las Vegas valley and the lake had warm nights. This was one of the things that I loved most about my home town. Sitting out there in the moonlight I felt completely detached from my body almost. I waited for an answer. I waited for some guidance. I got none that night. God had abandoned me…or was I listening hard enough?

The next morning we went into town to get tooth brushes. I walked with them into a grocery store and we all bought the one we wanted and we also got some Q-tips and a few more boxes of Pop-Tarts. Eddie put some wine down his pants and we checked out with the money we had that was quickly running out. After getting to the car, they opened the wine and we all drank what we could before going to the gas station. Using the remainder of the cash, we filled the tank up with as much gas as we could afford. We needed a plan. We needed to figure out where we were going next.

“We’re going to Texas” said Natalie. “I got friends there, and we can rob 7-11’s on the way. They gotta give you the money at the counter if they get held up, so we gotta get a fake gun or somethin’ . Ya, my brother worked at a 7-11, they teach them to just give the money so they don’t have to pay nobody’s family if the worker gets killed.” She stuffed another half of a Pop-tart into her mouth and sipped from the bottle of wine. I could see bits of pastry go back into the bottle and float at the top of the remaining wine.

“Yeah, well, my dad has a gun” Eddie said. “Lets get some food first, then we can go there and get it. He won’t even know its gone. They’re at work right now, so lets figure out a way to get real food before we leave so we can eat this shit in the car on the way there.”

There was a Pizza Hut just down the road from here. It was the kind they used to have all over, the eat in kind with a salad bar. We made our plan as we parked the car. We’d all go in, eat, order enough pizza so we could have leftovers, then Natalie would go get the car and pull it up by the door just in time for us all to run out and leave before we payed the bill. We all agreed on the plan and after going over it a few times out loud, we figured we were as ready as we’d ever be.

We walked in and waited to be seated, just like the sign told us. A woman helped us to a table that seated all 5 of us and we made our order. 2 large pizzas with everything. 4 salad bars, 5 drinks, bread sticks. We sat nervously as we waited for our food. Nobody had even glanced at us suspicously. Everyone seemed to accept these 5 14-16year olds sitting in a Pizza Hut, filthy, one with slippers on.

The food came and we ate. None of us ate too much, knowing that we would have to be eating this for the next day or two. The girls all got salads at the salad bar and I ate fruit. It was beautiful. I didn’t realize how much I’d missed fruit and vegetables. I savored every bite, my stomach still fighting to ditch the poisons I’d been given. It ached and twisted still, but I had been learning to ignore it. It wasn’t that terrible anymore, plus I was greatful for the pain. It proved that I was alive.

When we were about done, Natalie said out loud “Oh, let me go get my purse. I forgot it in the car!” She was the WORST actress ever, and the other girls stood up to go with her. The other girls leaving was NOT part of our discussed plan, but I didn’t want to cause a distraction. I looked at Eddie who was beginning to realize that things were suddenly changing.

Nat and the girls got out to the car and got in when a man approached the table. He was wearing a manager’s tag. He had a small old woman behind him holding a check.

“Here’s your bill” he said, looking back and forth between us.

“I uh, I need to go to the bathroom” Eddie said. He grabbed my arm and we started walking toward the bathroom and as we got closer to it, he bolted with me towards the door.

“WAIT! STOP! YOU DIDN’T PAY!” the man shouted at us.

We ran out the door and through the parking lot. There was a short fence behind the restaurant, and behind it was a neighborhood of modest track homes. We jumped it, just as the man came out and was yelling at us to stop. He was shouting something about the police and we kept on running. Natalie had left us. While we were in the store, she had started the car with those other two runaways and left us. It was that fast, by the time we’d run out, she was already gone. I could not believe it, yet I realized how stupid I was to trust her in the first place.

We were walking quickly through the streets of the neighborhood behind the restaurant. I was looking quickly back and forth down every street, beginning to panic. There were people outside, watering their lawns and getting their mail, and they were watching us. Two teenagers, one girl, one boy, the girl in slippers being dragged by the arm by the boy who was twice her size. It was right then we saw a black and white patrol car turn slowly down the street we were on. We started to walk more quickly and turned onto another street.

A woman was out watering her lawn, hose in hand, slowly spraying back and forth. We walked up to her fence and started making small talk so that it looked like we were old friends, or perhaps her grandchildren. She looked at us in our filth and the hose in her hand went slack when she saw the police car pull up behind us. The water from the hose was pouring onto her feet but she didn’t even notice, she was so terrified.

“Turn around” the officer said.

“I’m going to hit him Alli” Eddie said under his breath. “You just run. I’m gonna hit him.” He was beginning to turn around and I could see his fists clinched. I peeked over my shoulder and saw 2 officers and another car approaching. There was no way we’d get out of this one. I decided to end this segment of our journey.

“Wait!” I shouted and everyone looked at me. “I give up…”